15 days ago ago, Jacob and myself began growing our mustaches to raise awareness and money for Men’s health. Here were my predictions at the beginning of the month:
- Jacob will grow a luxurious mustache that makes him look like he’s from the 70s or starring in Magnum P.I.
- I will grow an awful mustache that looks like I’m approaching 8th grade graduation and alienates me from everyone I know
Well, it’s worse than I thought. Jacob has been strutting around the streets just swatting the women of NYC away from him. He’s a bonafide stud. Honestly, the mustache may be his best look. He shouldn’t return to his old ugly face (had to get at least one dig in).
On the other hand, my face is an absolute mess. Hair in splotches everywhere. Decent amount of hair on the left side of my face. Less on my right side. Scraggly goatee coming in. Nothing is connecting. And to top it off, the piece de resistance, is this dirty mustache that sits atop my lip. It’s enough to qualify as a mustache but from far away it just looks like I missed a spot while showering. My friends and family refuse to talk to me. People avoid eye contact with me in public. Children are insisting on getting in my van.
Here we are at the half way point of the month:
Faces aside, this is a great cause. If feasible, please donate to men’s health at the link below:
