I’ve been thinking about the upcoming Presidential Election a lot lately and I’m starting to feel like maybe no one should be President.
I mean it’s a really big job, ya know, being the leader of the free world and what not. Maybe we shouldn’t trust just one person with that job including and especially those that WANT the job.
I mean what kind of egotistical maniac thinks that they are deserving and capable of the most powerful position in the world. Wanting the job should should be grounds enough for exclusion from the process. To want to be president you have to be sadistic or a megalomaniac. Both are not great options for our moral leader.
And yet, every four years a bunch of people tell us that they can do better than the last guy by telling us stuff the last guy said when he was running. It’s quite literally bananas.
So I say we just do away with the position. Who needs it? Let’s move on. I mean we’ve tried 45 different times all to tepid results. Maybe we just chalk this up as a failed experiment and start thinking about a different system.
In the meantime, while we decide how to move forward as a nation we’ll probably need someone in place as a hold over. Just a temporary person in power while we fix this whole mess. So okay, ugh fine, I’ll take over as temp prez but only for a short time. Obviously there’s no time table for when we figure out the new world order but I promise to keep my stint in office short. I mean, we don’t want to rush things though. Eh, probably should take our time. Hmm. Okay let’s just say for convenience sake I’ll hold the office with a undetermined end date. And then once this is all wrapped up I’ll hand over the power. But only after the transition period, of course. Can’t totally relinquish power if we are in the middle of a war or economic downturn. Or a weekday. Or like a rainy day. We need to be responsible about this. Oh and I mean it’s just logistics but you’ll probably want to start calling me czar. Haha I know it’s super silly but I think it will just help to get everyone on the same page and I’d truly hate to have to imprison your full family but rules are rules.
*This Message Has Been Approved By The New American Czar, Long May He Reign, Handsome and Strong*
