By Amanda Bressner
I’m single as shit. There’s no time of year that reminds me how single I am quite like Valentine’s day. Yet, I don’t mind not having a significant other on February 14th. What I do mind is the stupid shit that is Galentine’s day.
“Galentine’s Day” originated from an episode of Parks and Recreation as a day of “ladies celebrating ladies.” However, in recent years it has become a catchy buzzword for girls to plaster on social media when they get together on/around Valentine’s day in order to celebrate how much they don’t need a girlfriend or boyfriend. While I’m definitely here for female empowerment, I can’t help but roll my eyes every time I see posts of girls kissing vodka bottles and breaking heart-shaped chocolate promoting how single they are during their Galentine’s Day festivities. What ever happened to the good old-fashioned girl’s night out (GNO)? Is this really what Miley Cyrus hoped for in 2007? For girls to need a specific occasion to appreciate their friends? I think she had higher expectations for us and for all GNOs.
I know what you’re thinking, “this girl really needs to get laid.” The answer to this is: yes! However, that’s not where this distaste stems from. Valentine’s Day is a day that has been promoted by businesses to increase sales during the slow time after the holiday season. Literally no one gives a f*ck if you’re actually in love or not! Similarly, “Galentine’s Day” has evolved into a commercialized occasion through hashtags and social media. According to a February 9th Wall Street Journal article titled “’Nobody Likes Valentine’s Day Anymore.’ Retailers, Florists Cash In on ‘Galentine’s Day,’ a Ladies-Only Spin,” “Everyone from Hallmark to Walmart suddenly has an idea” on what you should be getting your lady friends for this dumb event. Without Instagram or Snapchat, no one would need a reason for an occasion to make them feel better about being single. The rise of social media and need for validation has turned us into pun-whores. While we’re at it, what about Pal-entine’s day???? Can’t we just celebrate all our friends?! Our pals? Our amigos!?
I think what really throws me about all the Galentine’s Day broadcasting is what the expected outcome is. Do girls feel better about being single? About how cool their friends are? Are they trying to let ~someone~ know they’re single? Because nothing is more attractive to a guy than posting all over Instagram how alone and desperate you are—but surrounded by great friends!
Can’t we all just spend the better part of February eating discounted chocolate and scrolling through Bumble without making it an event? Or going out with that guy blowing up your DMs? Or getting together with your best girl friends to appreciate and love each other over sushi? I know this makes me sound like a bitter asshole, but I just really hate Galentine’s day.
