Last night at Thanksgiving dinner, many of you were pressed by friends and family about your single status. It’s an awkward but unfortunately inevitable conversation this time of year. And rarely is there a suitable response. But now I think it’s officially okay to say that is it too expensive to be in a serious relationship.
Do ya’ll see what’s going on out there? And by out there I mean on Facebook and Instagram. Let’s totally take out the price of the actual wedding. I’m not talking about the ceremony. I’m not even talking about the ring. Society has accepted those expenses. I’m talking about all of the “new-age” engagement activities that were invented for the social media era.
Every engagement nowadays seriously seems like an NBA player’s retirement tour. It’s nonstop posts. I’m not going to fact check this but I’m pretty sure that the number one job in America right now is “guy who takes photos in random barley fields”. All that time honing his barley field photography is finally paying off! People said it was too niche but look at him now!!
It just all feels like a weird Truman show. You remember when your parents would get you dressed up in clothes you never wore and take you to a professional photo place? That’s what this looks like except this time you have free will. You’re choosing to put on that stupid vest over that plaid shirt and force intimacy in front of a stranger. I don’t like this word but… cringe.
So there you go grandma. I’m not single. I’m poor.
